Hello world,
Many of you are wondering what im feeling. The wound of my brother’s death is freshly open as if it was June 25, 2009. Pain, grief, sorrow, anger is still with me. The only thing that is different is the manner in which I handle devastating events. True enough there has been one awful thing after another happening to me ever since I could remember. There has been a dark thunderous cloud over my head for 35 years but im going to allow the sun to shine right through it.
Not only do I have to deal with the death of my brother but I am also currently dealing with the fact that my grandfather William Jackson is in the hospital in intesive care fighting pneumonia and lung cancer. My grandfather has been one of the two positive male role models in my life. My grandfather William Jackson is a fine human being. I love that man and he knows it and he has loved me uncondiotionally. Just like my parents do and my big sister Rebbie. Im so blessed as a woman to have experienced that kind of love. It truly out weighs my crazy life!
I have been thinking about death and I absoulutly hate the death and the process of death. I dont like the idea of Michael being alone in the dark, void to all things. I dont like the idea or the meaning of the word GOODBYE. Its funny because my tribe (Choctaw Nation) never says the word GOODBYE. They always say SEE YOU LATER instead.
I feel that Michael’s death caused his energy to return to the Earth. Michael is in the sun, sky, the trees and the wind. Michael has found its way back to the rotation of the Earth. Michael helps to keep this Earth spinning on it’s axis. That is how I think of Michael. Always around and never forgotten.
Thanks to everyone that stops by and leaves a positive comment. Remember people, love one another for you are not promised tomorrow.
My love always
Iron Rose a.k.a Joh’Vonnie Jackson
22 Responses to “Never can say goodbye”
BEAUTIFUL words JohVonnie, you will never be alone as you have a wonderful family who will be with you every step of the way. Thinking of you today.. L.O.V.E you loads x
Hi JohVonnie, MJ is not alone in the dark,he is in heaven happy and singing and dancing.He is your brother,he is forever a part of you and you are forever a part of him.
Hi Johvonnie, I never would have thought I would wake up today and yet still be sad, like the tightening of the chest and near tears, or feeling a lump in your throat and can not get the feeling to go away. I am at a lost still. I have wish on many occassions he was still amongst us. WoW is all I can say. By the way, I am a virgo also, and part of my heritage is choctaw Indian, amazing the things people have in common. Well in any case I celebrating today with my cd’s in tole and my memories less the drama in Micheal’s life. I do not believe there will ever be another Singer such as Micheal, better yet I know it will not be. I am sending you hugs, Kisses, and such much love. I do understand how a lost can be. Take time to breathe today you deserve too, please try not to be sad!!!!
Love
Renee
I’m sure Michael did not want that the people feel sad after his departure. His life, his music, but especially his philosophy of life: “love unconditionally”, must be a joy to celebrate on the inevitable.
All the great men of humanity have one thing in common: “leave a legacy and hope that the legacy will be continued by future generations”.
The Michael’s greatest legacy, is not his music: is his philosophy about life. He said that love is the most important thing in this life. He said that we must love all the people. We should love the planet and be one with this planet.
Now, a year after his departure, I remember Michael with joy, as the man with more positive influence to this day from my generation.
Thanks to life, for giving us Michael.
wow. what can one say on this sad occasion. as a matter of fact, i am sad listening to this song on your site by michael. that man was something special and extraordinary. it is amazing how michael’s passing has affected so many people that they’re even shocked at how deep the pain is. i cried like a baby for 3 weeks last year upon hearing the news of michael’s passing. then i would cry at the mention of michael’s name or image on television, which was constant. so i was constantly crying. and i know michael is here in spirit and watching and loving the legacy he left behind. he was chosen to come here and do a job; a job that he did well and completed. michael’s job was done and it was time to go home and rest. i am sure he is watching over you…don’t you feel his presence? he’s with you, johvonnie. you are not alone and michael is not in the dark. be happy. be strong. be loved. peace my friend.
…
(Just wanted you to know I was here.)
J,
Those are beautiful words. But Michael is not divine. We cannot worship Michael. I love Michael. God created him. Worship the creator; not the creation. Michael praised God all the time when he spoke. He would not want us to speak of him as some Idol. Michael knew and respected the fact that God gave him his ability to entertain. And, he expressed to us that it was all for Love. All the sun, sky and earth stuff makes no sense. I pray that your family finds peace. You really should have a relationship wiith your family. That is so wrong on many levels. The fault is not with you. All of your brothers and sisters need to be ashamed of themselves.
Keep your head up!
I hope that your day is GRAND like it should be. It is always hard to say goodbye to someone you care about. Your brother was loved by the world…I think we all felt like we lost something this time last year. I pray that your grandfather has a speedy recovery. You do know you’re a QUEEN, right?
Keep your focus on the resurrection promise at John 5:28,29 in the Holy Scriptures
“Do not marvel at this, because the hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice and come out, those who did good things to a resurrection of life, those who practiced vile things to a resurrection of judgment.”
stay strong!
Hey Joh Vonnie, I just wanted to show you some love and say that we are here for you. I had you on my mind all weekend. I celebrated MJ’s life and legacy all weekend. Missing MJ so much. I feel close to the family because I grew up with them thru their music. I am glad to know that I can get to know you also this way, thru your website. We are facebook friends, but I found your website because I was curious to learn just a little more about you. I know so much about your family but I didn’t know you. I enjoy reading your blogs. You are a very good writer and express yourself really well. I hope your grandfather is doing better. You are an amazing person from what I read in your writings. You have a loving heart and you are a strong woman. I have you in my prayers along with all the other Jacksons. Blessed Love~~
Your grandfather William Jackson?? Hmm.. I thought Joe Jackson’s father was named Samuel and he passed away a long time ago..
Anyway, best wishes to you.
..and William
Hey Jo ! Just stopped by like always to see what you have to say these days . . . I am sad because of the 1 year anniversary of the passin’ . Let me tell you though , I danced my pants off ! I’m happy to see that you’ve been doin’ good . I see you’ve found love ! WOWZAH ! lol . WONDERFUL NEWS ! Oh , also I see pics of Yasmine ! She’s pretty . Look just alike ! I hope you get blessings abundantly in present/future times ! I love you <3
Bonsoir Iron Rose,
Sorry but i don’t speak english…
Michael n’est pas dans le noir, il est en chacun de nous..
Hi joh sorry to hear about your grandfather thorght is was Samuel jackson (joe father) i thorght. i bit confuse who william jackson?
just confuse can you corret me thanks
This last year has been difficult. I have been a big fan of Michael since the mid 80s and in a way I feel like a part of me died with him. I am now turning in to a more bitter person who I don´t really like. Still his legacy will never die and I think the media will start to treat him more fair after some time has passed. I still think that his death could have been prevented though.
I am also very sorry to hear about your grandfather. Is William Jackson your mothers father?
May God bless your wounded spirit, Joh’Vonnie. I know though a higher power keeps you sane for you have so much strength to share openly here on the internet about your pain. I know you have guardian angels protecting you in your darkest hours of despair. Hang in there. I’m praying for you!
About your sister Rebbie I think it is her grandsons birthday soon (but I don´t remember the exact date). Pls tell him happy birthday. And check this video out. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Egn0bATSPqE&feature=related
I think it’s sadpeople die so soon. One of my family members died in June. We were very close. She was my mothers mom and my best friend. I think about her everyday. Funearals are a celebration. They celebrate how great of a person and how good of a life that person lived. They may be gone but, they never will be forgotten. No one will be able replace that person. MJ went to heaven because he was a good a person he was. He helped lots of people. When ever someone talked about him he ignored them. I didn’t get a chance goodbye to my grandmother. Cheer up Joh’Vonne life will only get better.
I always this gone to soon
Gone but never forgotten
The earth stops moving
He is the wind beneath my wings
He is still here in our memory
We think I ya not real
We fell lost
We fell mad
All we can do is cry
Our hearts are broken
Waiting to be filled with laughter and Joy
So hang in their Joh Vonnie I feel your pain
Stay strong
Hello Joh Vonnie,
I’m sorry to about the death of your grand father, and of course Michael. Dealing with death is never easy. I also wanted to comment on an article I read where you apologized for your birth. I can’t begin to describe what I felt after reading it. You have nothing to apologize for. If I may be frank, the 30 something years of pain you have experience is the result of the selfishness of two people. Please understand, I do not mean to rude, or mean in any way, but people are often selfish. There are times when we don’t stop to think about what our actions will do to us and others. Your pain is very clear. May be if you reach out to others in similar situations, it might help to ease your pain, and with time, maybe your family’s attitude will change also.
I would also like to ask if either of your parents has ever apologized to Katherine for the pain they caused her?
Best Wishes,
Pat
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